Sunday, August 31, 2008


randomly met the whole world this weekend. randomly shaun chook and ronghua in starbucks (i dunno and don't want to knw what two grown men are doing together at starbucks). chook looks like he's worth one million bucks as usual. he probably is. hahaha. den went on to randomly meet LAM LIWEN. hahahaha totally got stunned cos i dun usually see odac ppl ard town, much less lam liwen in town! and finally randomly meeting george yongsheng and sheena. so what's the moral of the story? dun ever do anything sneaky in town cos the whole world's in town on a saturday evening. we were like entourages going ard meeting different entourages, stopping to chat for a good 10 mins, and den moving on to meet other entourages again. it's a small small world.

and comex is bloody bloody crowded. it's just filled with humans and more humans and shitloads of humans everywhere. it's practically a turn off lah. how can anyone shop in piece under that kinda conditions. and i realised singaporeans are hell rich. there was actually a 10 min queue at the toshiba redemption counter, and everyone in that queue had a new laptop. those things are at least 1k and above la, and ppl are buying them like it's macdonalds ice cream cone. and for the first time in my life, i actually walked up the emergency exit from city link up to open space cos there was a human jam and it hasn't been moving for 15 mins. the crowd's really crazy. from this i conclude comex is evil.

and and and the best part of the night was electricoooo! wah first time see damn live, and the best part was it's FREE. but too bad esplanade became yalam land for the night. and they just love to push and shove and make so much noise so that they can be the centre of attraction. but anyway electrico's good stuff! not as good as before, but still good for a local band. pity they didn't play tracks from their oldest album. so half the time i didn't knw wad they were singing. hahaha. and amanda ling's super pretty la. lol i tink without her electrico isn't electrico.

so tmr i go back to serving the damn nation. going through the whole cycle of depression, convincing myself that life ain't so bad, and slipping ever so easily back into depression again. okay perhaps depression's too strong a word, perpetual gloom maybe? either way, it's still gonna suck bad.

i've realised, that only divine intervention can save me from this predicament. and i realise that's not gonna be very possible in reality.

shouted out at 7:02 AM

Friday, August 29, 2008


it's 1.50am now and i really have no idea what to do. it always happens during weekends since army ever started. u look forward to weekends but when it finally stares u straight in the face u've no idea what to do with it. it's like u knw u're supposed to meet up with friends yet everyone's so busy with stuff, and u end up spending your entire weekend alone at home.

i'm starting to get very very frustrated with the life i'm living right now. it's aimless, pointless, goalless. i'm living day by day, week by week, month by month. i dare not think bout the future, cos there's no future to begin with. unless u're talking bout 2 years later. that's really quite a long time more. oh yes army's where boys become man, where guys mature. we mature cos we're weathered. army sucks the life out of everyone. the monotony of pointless regimentation and rituals is enough to kill any vibrancy or child likeness in anyone. it's like those dementors in harry potter. they come in and complete suck your soul out. that's wad army does. perhaps that's why ppl who have gone through army are much quieter than before, subdued. and maybe that's why we're in a sense more matured. we've been though the most desolate moments of our lives, we're weathered and empty. try living such a life for 2 years, and u'll understand what i'm saying. it's a mentally taxing, and it kills everyone slowly.

army has forced me to cope with life at it's harshest conditions. i see no meaning in my life right now. there's nothing to look forward to, nothing to hold on to, absolutely nothing. yet i've to live though this, cos i've got no choice. it's called conscription for a reason.

and when logic finally tells u that your life is at it's very worst and it's not gonna change for a long time to come, your mind takes over and starts painting illusions for you to live in. when logic fails to find a rose tinted glass to view life, your mind creates one, before depression starts taking it's toll.

we become joker. always smiling, but never sound.

i call it perpetual disillusionment.



shouted out at 10:50 AM

Monday, August 25, 2008


the man who can't be moved.


okay after like half a year of seeing wall-e posters everywhere, and getting really impressed by it's trailer, i finally found out what wall-e means! waste allocation load lifter - earth class! haha the ppl at pixar are really a super smart bunch. i'm definitely gonna watch the movie man. just that i've no idea when.

and i realise after being absent from town for almost a month, things have been changing man. first of all i got a huge shock when i took the escalator up from city link. suddenly got one charles and keith pop out of no where, and flash and splash looked super different from before. for a moment there i tot i was in the wrong place. ahh i can feel i'm really getting older and older man. and for once in my life i got caught in a human jam. like i really couldn't move. i dun understand why the gahmen want more kids when the streets are already flooded with ppl. maybe they shld expand the walkways of city link abit larger so i won't get caught in a damn human jam.

and somehow pretty girls wld always have ugly boyfriends while ugly boyfriends wld always get pretty girlfrends. no matter how many logic there are behind this phenomenon, there's only one thing that i'm really worried about. if this holds true, i'll get a damn damn damn DAMN DAMN DAMN ugly girlfriend in future. oh wells i guess sacrifices must be made yeah. SIGH.

sorry man i love living in my own delusions.


anyway i'm really tired. life hasn't been kind to me lately.


cheerios!

shouted out at 7:25 AM

Monday, August 18, 2008


SHUT UP AND LET ME GO!


i swear listening to the ting tings naturally make u break out into some sort of a spastic dance. it's freakin addictiveeeeee!



i ain't freakin', i ain't fakin' this
i ain't freakin', i ain't fakin' this
i ain't freakin', i ain't fakin' this
shut up and let me go, HEY!

shouted out at 7:54 AM

Sunday, August 17, 2008


goodbyes are meant for lonely people standing in the rain.


okay for once in my life i'm really proud that i'm a singaporean. seeing your flag rise up in the olymics is really something remarkable and something which we haven't seen in a long long time. well even though it's basically china vs china, winning silver means that singapore is economically sound enough to actually have spare cash to import china players, give them tons of cash and convert them to singaporeans to compete against china. abit ironic eh. but it reflects that our economy and country has matured and we're no longer in a developing stage where all resources must be channelled to building basic infrastructures and stuff like that. yes so be proud of that, and not so much on whether we won the silver medal or not. cos actaully china won both silver and gold. and if u detach yourself from all these nationalistic sentiments bout bringing home medals and all that rhetoric, there's actually more to these. investing in sports increases the vibrancy of a nation, which in turn attract high end foreign talents. in order to compete with other countries in attracting these professionals, we need to have a leading edge, and that comes in the vibrancy from sports. we're in a way emulating cities like london or paris. so the government is actually investing in sports to spur the economy. u tink what, they so free to pump millions for 3 silver medals and all the hype bout the singapore spirit? sorry hor our government's not that dumb. haha i read this somewhere sometime ago and i kinda liked the idea. and perhaps it's true anyway.

ANYWAY. moving on. this past week has been has been filled with uncertainly. posted to my new base again, i've no idea how life there wld be like, and how my routine wld be. and there would confirm be initial teething problems. which means a whole lot of shit to go through again. sigh can't things just stay the way there are and never change? and somehow i really feel aimless now. i've no short or long term goals AT ALL. i'm just living life aimless and taking it one day by a time. well my ultimate goal is like to survive army, but tt's gonna be achieved in a long long time 2 years later. i feel like i'm just floating about and i probably am.



and somehow i just can't forget the tofu cheesecake at sun with moon. it's really GODLIKE. someone shld go steal their secret recipe and start mass producing them in LARGER portions. the restaurant's one is way too small! tt's the problem with high class high end atas tai tai restaurants. food so expensive yet the portion small like anything.


and this isn't a mirror image okay. we really order 7 tofu cheesecakes with candles on top for sihan! HAPPY NINETEEN BIRTHDAY TAN SIHAN! =) can see that u're having the time of your life in uni with your dunno how many thousand frens and your monday wednesday friday boyfriend. haha what's his name again? alvin or sth like that rite. LOL. okay i gotta admit i forgot bout your bday on thursday and i didn't wished you. but when i realised it on friday i didn't knw wad to do so til now i still haven't msged you. sorry!!! pls forgive me ya, and can you tell me wad shld i do now. hahahaha. catch up soon over dinner or sth yeah.

and to numbskull farrell, hope u're still surviving in brunei jungles. 2 more weekends and u'll be out. whether in one piece of not that's another issue. hahaha take care bro. i'll see you soon.
and tmr wld be a brand new day of serving the nation while the girls party in clubs and make new frens in uni. life isn't really very fair is it? hahaha

shouted out at 6:44 AM

Wednesday, August 13, 2008


when we were young and happy.


i've been doing quite alot of thinking lately. like suddenly things are so mutable. or maybe things have always been mutable, just that i was too busy to notice, too busy to look back. i rmbred the start of jc, my first time in odac, my first day in bmt, my first day in air force school, and now my first day in my air base. these days went by with much apprehension, and it was really really stressful. cause suddenly i find myself in a new environment, meeting new ppl. yes socialising is hard, and i dun really like it. making new friends ain't a very easy task, especially u dunno who are the nice and ugly ones. and u never know how things will turn out to be. everytime i do this it's like taking a whole new gamble, and i dun like gambles. haha poker isn't gambling hor it's taking calculated risks.

my past 7 weeks at air force sch has really been an enjoyable one. i won the gamble. yet subtracting the initial teething period, i only had a good 3 weeks to really enjoy the company of friends whom i've slowly and painfully gotten to know from the start of day one. and it ended just like tt cos now we're all in different air bases, and it's sort of a mutual understanding that we won't be seeing each other again in our lives.

and i realise stepping out of jc wld mean never meeting some frens again, unless we're fated, which is another gamble altogether. and everyone's just drifting apart inevitability. isn't it heartbreaking that after all that we've went through, built up friendships from scratch, just to watch it crumble and disappear. i guess army just epitomises life's mutability cos we have to change different environments and meet different ppl for hell lot of times. until it really gets sick and tiring. just as everything's gelling together, u pack up and leave. i feel like i've been floating around ever since i enlisted in april, and i'm in no control of my life.

and i'm not not not not notttt being emo or pessimistic here okay. it's just something that struck me today while i was stoning in army as usual. i tink my profession shld be a stoner and not nsf, cos tt's what i do 70% of the day.


perhaps change is the only constant. if tt's the case, i guess i need to get one hell of a good anchor to make sure i stay in one spot for as long as i can, til the waves of fate sweeps me away again.

shouted out at 6:33 AM

Tuesday, August 12, 2008


u're the stalk of the cherry on the cream of the cream of the cream of the crop!


uni has kidnapped all my girl friends. they are either locked up in kent ridge, or god knows where jurong in ntu. i see a resemblance with uni and army man. but they're having the time of their lives man. with new friends, new orientation groups (note to self: trixer is NOT geri's new boyfren), new environment, new subjects. yes i hate having to wait 2 years to go uni. IT'S A WASTE OF MY YOUTTTTTHHHHHHHH. it suddenly came upon me that i'm gonna only start work at 27. tt's uber fucked up man. by then the girls alr have stable careers man, and i'm just a fresh grad. gosh army really has a way of screwing things up for guys. nevermind the leadership or whatever bullshit we learnt during that 2 years. trust me it adds up to nothing in the end. okay no point lamenting. not like i can get out of it anyway. but with the girls locked up in a far far away place, even meeting up becomes an obstacle. like jurong and town dun really mix. and well slowly they'll move on with their new frens (well ppl move on no matter how u try to assure each other that "we'll always keep in touch" it has become more of a rhetoric than real plans. that's just a fact of life man.) and so when the girls move on the guys are left behind stuck in their own army world talking with their own army lingo wearing their own army singlets and having ugly short hair. we've entered another world too. the army boyzz club. with my rifle and my buddy and me.

meet up with class ppl over the weekends. well actually i was the only guy there since all the army ppl returned to their army boyzz club day earlier. air force being welfare decided to give me one more day off for national day. hahaha. we went dis place called sun with moon at wheelock, which i swear i haven't seen before in my life. cos it's just super atas. low class ppl like me are just satisfied with my coffee shop chicken rice (with extra soya sauce) and teh ping. i can't stand atas restaurants cos the servings are just so small u can never be full. unlike coffe shop chicken rice, which always gets u super bloated, and not forgetting the chili! hahaha. anyway, this jap restaurant was either being spastic or acting cute. why name a restaurant sun with moon? isn't it just eclipse. and i tink eclipse sounds far cooler than sun with moon. u gotta give it to the japs man. and nice seeing everyone after so long. well nobody changed i guess. except that everyone got much much tanner. expect jiezhen and renee. yes. hahaha.

okay it's getting late alr. i shall blog the rest tmr or never blog it at all. and dis paragraph is specially dedicated to YEO HUI HUI! hahaha CHEER UP! smile at the world and the world will smile at you man ! :) err but deep down u knw tt i'm lying otherwise i wld be a happyboi_89@hotmail.com. hahahahaha. okay i'm obviously not very good at cheering ppl up, neither am i good at telling jokes. maybe u can ask the joker for some huh. hahaha but just CHEER UP. ohh i knw how! eat chocolates! yess. eat lots and lots and lots of chocolates and ice cream. hahaha. argh i dunno man, but i guess tmr will be a better day yes? :)


army tmr. argh life sucks. (haha quite contradictory to my above paragraph)

shouted out at 7:44 AM

Wednesday, August 06, 2008


that day, like every other random day, while i was buying soya bean frm the vending machine like what i always do for 6 weeks without fail, this random guy randomly walked pass me and randomly told me "did u knw soya bean decreases your sperm count by quite alot?"


erh thanks alot man bro.

shouted out at 5:13 AM

Sunday, August 03, 2008


WHY SO SERIOUS


i swear batman's one of the nicest movie i've ever seen in my life. just tt it's freakin long and long and long and longggggggg. the last time i had to hold my bladder for tt long was during a lvls okay. joker's really at it's best. and sorry man i knw i'm abit laggy to watch batman only like now but u gotta understand tt army boys live in their own worlds inside their camps. we dun really see the world much from monday to friday. honest. i dun even knw wad's happening to the world rite now cos the sunday times is more intent on reporting stuff like xiaxue and dawn yang fighting some court case over defamation. HAHAHA tt was the first thing i saw when i flipped open the sunday times today. ohhh and the nxt piece of news i read was tt the youth olympics ppl are gonna stay at ntu hostels instead of nus so ntu hostels are gonna get like aircon and new furniture. wich isn't a very good thing considering i've a slot booked at nus not at ntu. yes jasmine tye u lucky girl. but i bet when they finally do up the air conditioning your course has ended alr haha.

and i dun really trust my face wash when it says "active anti acne" or some shit like tt cos i've been getting shit loads of pimples for no apparent reason. like i'm totally not stressed up now cos it's army and u dun use brains in army so no brains equals no stress. and i'm super clean i bathe 2 times everyday and my highest record was 4 baths a day. water is free in army and time is abundant so why not make use of the opportunity to bathe and bathe and bathe? hahaha. yes so i'm actually very clean and stress free wich means there shld be no reason why i shld be getting pimples! so i tink it's the face wash! gosh i've no idea why i'm actually writing this i tink i'm really too free. haha.

and dee if u're reading this pls REPLY me and tell me the titles of all the books! dun run off with ting and abandon the world okay.

and i just realised just now farrell's going to brunei nxt thursday. okay i wanted to say something bad but i decided not to cos this month 7th month ah all the ghosts running around u never knw if they actually read blogs. it's the 21st century man. anything can happen yo. ahh and all of u out there better go back home by 7pm and lock and doors and windows at night ah. maybe we shld all watch the maid now and get into the mood of the season. LOL.

and nxt week's national day!! wich only means i get one day holiday. super shoik man. other than that national day's really just another ordinary day. in fact the parade shld just be televised on kid's central cos only kids watch it. i've no interest in the whole thing cos for nineteen years of my life i've been watching the same thing. even if i wanna see fireworks i wld see it live not on the tele. yes so pls put ndp on kid's central and spare the adults. after mths in army, i've kinda had enough of the army's rhetoric and i dun tink i need anymore.


for now it's back to serving the nation again yo. i absolutely love fixing helicopters.

shouted out at 6:17 AM